Top Ten Things Maureen Johnson Hates
by ILikeScarvesAndGuitars
Summary: Yes I do love these. From Mickey Mouse to the word 'Five' to well, whatever else Maureen seems to hate,I covered it all. R&R!


**A/N: So after saving the world, I have decided to continue on to the loveable Maureen Johnson who seemed to make everybody's hate list. I was asked by many folks to continue this (last reviewers, holla!) and I graciously said "Yes sir" and made it my duty. Dedicated to SiriusLovesRent cause he's basically the coolest person known. And is a faithful reviewer, and we all need those. Enjoy it please! R&R&R&R&R! (well just do the first two R&R's but if ya wanna do more, go ahead.)  
****Disclaimer: Let me rap this: Hey my name's Samantha/and I write my own stuff/this fic included/enough is never enough/so sit right back/take a seat/I don't own nothin'/Lemme repeat/I don't own nothin'/not even Maureen.

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**Like, hello, I am Maureen Johnson, the favorable bisexual of Avenue B. Or A. Whatever. I am favorable (whatever that means). This writer seems to make me a little on the ditzy side now and then (soooo not true.), but I'm trusting her with my life. Or this fiction. Whatever. Oh I do like the word 'whatever'. It's like….the best word ever. Except 'moo'. AHA. Get it? Cows….leap of faith….moo. LOL. (Authors note: She totally did NOT just use LOL in a fanfiction. Oh my Larson. She did.) Anywayyyyyyyyyyy, as I do my big Maureen sarcastic eye roll, we will carry forth with this fic. LO-(author cuts her off before she uses chat speak).

**Top Ten Things Maureen Johnson Hates  
(Because Mark didn't do a title)**

10. **Mickey Mouse.** Uhm kinda creepy. He's a mouse. With no shirt. Like come on. Donald Duck has pants. Wait. He doesn't have pants, does he? He has a shirt. OHMIGOD how about they totally trade wardrobes one day? Oh that'd be nice. Maybe Disney would be like a billion times cooler.

9. **Flirting.** Wait, wrong list…

8. **Over-jealous girlfriends who are lawyers and make a big freaking deal about everything. **But Maureen Johnson NEVER points fingers.

7. **Roger Davis.** Ugh. Jerk. Yeah he has the pants, but whatever. I have…pants. And mine aren't plaid. But they are like a billion times cooler. And they are leather. And I have a nicer ass, right Mark? Ha. By the way, Roger, it wasn't very nice of you to write that in your top ten list. I'm a nice person, I guess people like you can't accept my niceness cause you are too busy throwing out meanness for everybody. And before you ask, niceness and meanness are actual words. I use spell check, thanks.

6. **BENNY FREAKING COFFIN. **For once I am speechless. Without speech. He is horrid scum. Horrid horrid scum. I only like that word cause I think Roger used it. But please. The man has no fashion taste, he kicks out people from buildings and is an all around meanie. Yeah Joanne tells me not to use that word cause I sound like an imbecile (I think that's how you say it. It doesn't sound very nice anyway), but it applies to Benny. Meanie.

5. **The word 'five**'. Ugh it's kinda weird. Five. Say it slowly. Fiiiive. Like…weird.

4. **Cops coming in and hurting my people. **Self explantional. Or something.

3. **People thinking I'm a complete ditz.** I am allowed to be a diva, cause that's what I am, right? But like…I'm not as ditzy as I sound. I mean, I'm pretty like, mature, you know? I know what I know. Like….I'm good at my own stuff. China wasn't built in a week, as they say. I think.

2. **Mark/Roger.** Ew!! I love gay people. They are like the most fabulous people ever to exist. But like please. I've slept with Mark, it isn't a lie. I've done it. I've done him! He's alright. I guess. But they are like total best friends. Like me and Mimi. Brothers. Sisters. Like, Mimi and I are like sisters. They are brothers. Not like Angel and Collins brothers, but like, you know. Oh my god I totally remember me being like "Hey mister, she's my sister." Wait. Did I say that? Did Joanne say that? Ugh I'm getting all confused. Somebody said it. I'm somebody's sister. And anyway, so like…yeah….I forget my point. Whatever. I obviously hate it somehow. Whatever I was talking about.

1. **Muffy.** Um yeah. So basically, she's the biggest bitch on this planet. The wicked witch of Bohemia. I think I don't hate her like….a lot. You know what. I need another number one. This one sucks. Literally. Like…ew, no. I meant that this number one point sucked. I don't care what Muffy sucks. Ew. Okay. Grossing myself out. Moving on to the final one. Titled: The Final 1.

(The) (Final) 1. **Control freaks who are snobs yet over attentive that are loveable droll geeks that are also anal retentive.** Um, yeah. Once again. Like sure it was a run-on sentence but I think it totally justifies it for itself. Or something. But whatever. I hope Joanne doesn't read this. Or maybe she's off with Mark somewhere tangoing. Not that I wouldn't mind….or anything. Argh. I'm so done with this list.  
But I do like talking about myself so maybe I'll continue (by now the author is close to stroking out). Oh my god somebody call the ambulance, I think the girl typing this out is going to pass out or something.  
JUST KIDDING!  
(the author breaks for a short period of time before she slaps Maureen.)  
Ouch, she hits harder than Joanne! Whatever. Review please,Maureen Johnson supports it!!


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